I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
