i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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