whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
My breasts were aching with rage.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
