How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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