I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Found the puke drawer
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
