I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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