Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize