Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize