At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
