Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
