She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize