Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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