SEEEEXXX PLEASE
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Let's paint friendship bongs
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
