She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
