i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
We need to rekindle our bromance
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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