Nicole vs. Life
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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