do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize