Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
