Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
