I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
