how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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