went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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