So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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