its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
