You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Randomize
