My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize