so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
