I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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