Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
