it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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