so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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