How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
