Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize