Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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