I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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