how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize