Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
We were destined to go to rehab together
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
