Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize