Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize