Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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