Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
