remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I stole a fireplace last night.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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