NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
