Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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