So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize