Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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