I just made out with a guy for $7.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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