pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
