I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
