i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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